Brave Princess
by leapinggrace
Summary: "Then how should I know that you will do it right?" she asks, raising her eyebrows and then cringing in pain. I pause. She's right. All we do is fight. Why should she trust me? Especially for something like this. Still, I can't leave her here, cringing in pain and trying to sew her skin together. "You'll just have to trust me on this one, princess," I say at last.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

**AN: Hello! This is the first chapter of my first Bellarke story ever! I am pretty excited. I hope some people will read this! Anyway, here is the first chapter. **

Bellamy:

I shook myself awake, sitting up and breathing hard. _Another one, _I thought to myself. Why couldn't they just stop coming? After every death in the camp, I always felt a great guilt. Every time, a nightmare would come. I see their faces in my dreams. They call out to me, begging for mercy. And every time, I am the one who kills them. This time it was a young girl, probably around fourteen.

_"Save me, Bellamy!"_

_I ignored her pleas and stepped forward, cocking the gun and raising it to my shoulder. She backs away from me, her eyes full of fear. And then, I pull the trigger. The shot rang out around us, filling my ears with the sound of it echoing away. She slumps to the ground, and I drop the gun. Blood pours from the wound in her chest. She coughs out blood, and tells me, over and over again, "You're a monster. You're a monster."_

_Her head turns to the side and I back away. _

Why couldn't I save them? And I would think the same three words, over and over again.

_I'm a monster._

I run my hands through my hair and lean forward, my elbows resting on my knees. There's no way that I would be going back to sleep. I put on a shirt and my boots, and step inside for some air. I look to the right at the guards who are looking beyond the wall. Good. They don't see me.

I close my eyes, and try to relax. I breathe. _In. Out. _I open my eyes. That's when I notice the hobbling figure on the other side of camp. I squint my eyes and try to see who it is. They look injured. If they are, I should get Clarke. As my eyes adjust to the lighting, and the figure comes closer, I can see who it is.

My eyes widen in surprise. Clarke? What happened to her? She doesn't see me yet, and I stay hidden in the shadows. She limps to the drop ship, clutching her hurt left leg in pain. She walks inside, and I go to the drop ship. I don't enter yet. Instead, I turn myself away from the tarp that hangs down to cover the entrance, and flatten my back up against the wall. This way, she can't see my shadow.

What could she be doing in there? I hear a small gasp of pain. And then another one. I start to become worried, so I go to the entrance. What is going on? I slip inside quietly, and she still doesn't notice me. Her back is toward me, and I try to get a glimpse of what is going on. Her shoulders shudder violently, and it looks like she is crying. She lifts a hand to her face and leans on it. I step forward, but I kick a bolt to the side. She immediately stiffens.

Her voice cracks when she speaks. "Who's there? You may as well come out."

I wait a few seconds before stepping out of the shadows. She hears my feet move against the metal, and she turns around.

Her eyebrows crease in confusion. "Bellamy?"

Her face has two thin, bloody scratches on it, and I can't stop wondering what happened to her. I can see her eyes watering, with tears that are threating to spill.

I simply nod in response.

"You shouldn't be here. Go back to sleep." She points to the exit door of the drop ship.

That's when I notice the blood on her hands, which are shaking almost uncontrollably. There is no way I am leaving her like this. I ignore her pleas and step closer.

"Clarke?" I ask. "What happened?"

I see the needle and thread in her hands, and the cut that she is trying to sew up. How on earth did she do that? There are already two stitches done, but it is nowhere near enough. She is so brave. How did she manage to even sew two stitches? She follows my gaze to her cut ankle. She lets out a shaky breath.

"I couldn't sleep," she says after a while. "So, I walked outside to get some air. Murphy snuck up behind me with a knife. He put his hand over my mouth, and dragged me outside the wall. I didn't know who it was. I don't even know how he managed to get back here. He kept taunting me, telling me how there was no one to save me. He told me that it was my fault he was banished. He wanted revenge, I guess. I tried to break free, but he cut my ankle. After that, he kept grabbing for the knife, trying to pick it up again. I was quicker. He jumped on me and I . . ." she stops talking and her eyes grow wide.

She looks up toward me. "I killed him."

"Princess, you—"

"I banished him, and I killed him," she says, her hands shaking.

I grab her hands and they quiver underneath my palms. "Listen to me, Clarke. It was self-defense. He attacked you."

She nods in response, but never meets my eyes. She doesn't believe she's innocent. I look over to the needle and thread she dropped in her lap. It takes a whole second before I make my decision.

"Alright, Clarke, I'm going to finish your stitches for you," I tell her, reaching down and picking up the needle.

"No, Bellamy, you don't need to. I got this," she says, still being stubborn when she is in so much pain.

Her shaking hands try to reach the needle before I can, but exhaustion takes its toll, and I am able to quickly snatch the needle.

"Have you ever done this before?" she asks.

"Honestly, no," I admit.

"Then how should I know that you will do it right?" she asks, raising her eyebrows and then cringing in pain.

I pause. She's right. All we do is fight. Why should she trust me? Especially for something like this. Still, I can't leave her here, cringing in pain and trying to sew her skin together.

"You'll just have to trust me on this one, princess," I say at last.

She looks up at me, her eyes alert and calculating. She stares at my eyes, trying to decipher whether or not she should trust me.

Eventually, she looks away and down to her ankle. She purses her lips. "Alright."

I nod. "I'll try to be gentle," I tell her, trying reassurance.

"Bellamy, there is no gentle way to do this. Just do it."

I meet her eyes, and nod. Slowly, I begin to stitch, trying to keep my stitches neat and even. I glance up, and she is shaking, rocking in tiny movements back and forth. I look back down and continue to stitch. _Come on, princess. You got this. _She lets out a gasp. Silent tears make their way down her cheeks.

I reach the middle of the cut, where it must hurt the most. Her fists clench, her nails digging hard into her palms. I glance up for a second, but quickly return to me stitching. Out of the corner of my eye, I can see her jaw clench tightly.

"Halfway through, Clarke," I tell her.

In response, she lets out an animalistic groan. She puts her head back as more tears fall down her face. She struggles to keep her ankle steady, but she does. Her toes curl.

"I'm tying it off now, princess," I tell her.

As I do, I realize something. The way I called her princess. It was out of respect, not loathing. She may be from the privileged, but she lost as much as any of us. Maybe more. She went from high in society to down on the ground. Yes. I have respect for her. She truly is brave. Braver than any of us. I recall the way her hands never shake when she is treating a patient. The way she always protects everyone, from anything. Even her own pain.

I cut the excess thread and she almost collapses on the floor. She props herself on her elbows. Slowly, she tilts her head down to look at the stitches. She nods and looks up to me.

"You did good. They're better than I thought you could do."

The corners of my mouth twitch up. "Can you get back to your tent?" I ask her.

"Not right now. There's a hammock, though, set up for patients. I can sleep there," she replies, nodding her head to the left.

I follow her gaze to the crude hammock. _Brave princess._

I turn around and she is looking at me gratefully.

"Thank you, Bellamy," she says, "I don't know if I could have finished that."

I smile at her. "You're brave, Clarke, not stupid. I still wish that you had woken someone up, though."

She looks at the floor. "Yeah."

She reaches behind her and grabs a bowl of water and a cloth. She starts furiously scrubbing at her hands, trying to rid herself of Murphy's blood. Even after the blood is long gone she keeps scrubbing. When I watch her doing this, something cracks inside of me. She's broken. Tired.

And still she's brave.

I lick my lips. "Clarke."

It's all I say, but she stops. She sighs. She puts away the water and the rag. Both are stained with blood. I'm scared because I know that not all of it is Murphy's. She reaches to grab hold of the table and tries to pull herself up. Her face tightens with struggle. She stands up halfway on her good leg and pauses there to breathe. She closes her eyes and I step forward. I wrap her arm around my shoulder and help her stand up. She hops along as I support her. I take her to the hammock.

"Are you sure you're going to be alright?" I ask her.

She nods against my shoulder. "I'll be fine." I pretend not to notice when her voice cracks.

I set her down in the hammock.

"Than you," she says again.

I smile back at her. "Of course."

She closes her eyes and I begin to walk away. When I turn around, I see her shoulders shaking once more.

I close my eyes and pretend not to notice.

_Brave princess. _

**AN: Hello, again! I hope you all liked that. I am probably going to switch off the point of views each chapter, so as not to have too many. I don't know though. I might change my mind later. I am already planning the next chapter right now, so look forward to that. Leave a review to tell me what you thought about this. I really want to write the characters "right," and I don't want them too out of character. Thanks for reading! :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

**AN: Hello! I don't really have much to say, other than:**

**Enjoy!**

Clarke:

I awake to a dull ache in my head and the movement of footsteps along the floor. I'm exhausted. I blink slowly and turn my head to the left. I am met with a grinning face. I jump, or as much as one can in a hammock.

"Hey, Monty," I say.

He grins. "Hey, Clarke. How's your leg?"

My eyebrows furrow in confusion, and he cocks his head down to my ankle. My pant leg has ridden up a bit in the night, and my stitches are clearly visible. I almost groan. _Almost. _How many people have seen that? That's when I remember.

Bellamy. _He, _of all people, finished my stitches for me. I suddenly remember Monty is waiting for an answer.

"It's good, I guess," I tell him.

"That's good," he says. "Need a hand getting up?"

"I appreciate your motives, Monty, but I'm really fine," I say, as politely as I can.

He holds his hands up in the air. "Alright, alright."

I get out of the hammock and limp over to the medical table, where I keep a medicinal salve. I dab two fingers into it and spread it over my stitches. Now that it isn't dark outside, I can take a closer look at the stitches. They are neat and even. I can't tell where mine end and where Bellamy's begin. I smirk. Next time I need help with stitches, I can just get him to do it. _Maybe. _

Monty waits patiently as I finish rubbing the salve in. We walk outside drop ship together, and it doesn't slip my mind just how awkwardly I am walking with my injured ankle.

That's infuriating.

As I walk out, almost all eyes in the camp turn toward me. I suppose I can understand why, if I think of what I must look like.

Messy hair, bruises, scratches, a limp. Yep. Understandable.

Everyone seems to be waiting for me to say something, so I do. "Is something wrong?"

No one has an answer for me, so I just say, "Then get back to work."

Slowly, the quiet buzz of voices starts again, and I make my way with Monty to the rations. We each take our portions and start to eat. At least five people still come up to me and ask if I'm okay. After the fifth person finally walks away, I share a look with Monty.

Eventually, he tells me, "Clarke, I'm going to go get Jasper. I haven't seen him this morning."

"Okay, Monty. I'll see you later."

After I watch him walk away, I go to a log and sit down on it. It's only been three seconds before someone taps my shoulder.

"What is it?" I quickly snap before turning around.

I see a small boy behind me, who must be only twelve. He shrinks just a bit when I snap at him.

"I'm sorry," I tell him, "I thought you were another person who was going to ask about my injury."

"It's okay," he says quietly.

I smile at him. "What's your name?"

"Asher," he replies, "and you're Clarke."

"That I am." I can't help but grinning at him. "I don't mean to be rude, but is there any particular reason you wanted to see me?"

His face falls. "I'm just . . . scared. Are we going to make it?"

My heart aches for this boy. He is so innocent. So fearful. I gesture for him to sit. His eyes stay downcast.

"Asher," I begin slowly, "look at me." I wait until he does before continuing. "We are going to make it. Bellamy and me always put all of you first. Always. We'll protect you. I promise. We'll be okay."

He nods slowly. He suddenly throws his arms around my neck, catching me off guard. I slowly put my arms around him.

I look up and my eyes meet Bellamy's. He isn't that far away. And, by the look on his face, he heard what the whole conversation. His eyes are sad, and they meet mine desperately. Mine must look the same way. I know what he's thinking. What we're both thinking. _How are we going to keep these people alive? _

"You're okay, Asher," I say gently.

He hesitantly releases me, and I watch as he walks away. _Oh, Asher._

I stand up slowly and meet Bellamy's eyes once again. With some undeclared agreement, we start walking toward each other. We meet in front of the drop ship.

"How are we going to do it?" I ask him, my voice strained with emotion. "How can we protect all these people?"

He touches my shoulder gently. "I don't know."

"We can't predict when the grounders will attack. I want to believe we're ready, but I'm not so sure."

He squeezes my shoulder. "At least we can try to be inspiring."

I turn to look at him.

"I heard you with that kid, Asher," Bellamy says, "You inspired him, Clarke, you really did."

"You inspire _all_ of them," I retort.

His mouth opens to protest, but a shrill scream suddenly penetrates the air, cutting him off. My head turns toward the sound. My eyes go wide when I see where it came from. Octavia. She's lying on the ground with a cut in her side, long and bleeding profusely. She had been skinning a rabbit. The knife must have slipped. I try to run toward her, but my ankle stops me with a jolt of pain. Bellamy, however, sprints toward his sister.

"Bellamy, get her to the drop ship!" I yell as I walk as quickly as my ankle tolerates toward the ship.

Bellamy is already scooping her up, and jogging over to the ship. Monty and Jasper help me clear a space for her on the table. Bellamy bursts through the drop ship door, his eyes wide with fear and pain for her sister. Bellamy lays her down on the table and stands watch as I begin to work.

Jasper hands me the water and a rag. I don't look up at Bellamy's face.

"This will sting, Octavia. I'm going to go as fast as I can."

Octavia reaches out for her brother's hand and he takes her small hand in both of his. Octavia is slipping in and out of consciousness, but when I put the cloth to her side, she begins to groan. Her cries grow louder and I start to work quicker.

"Monty!" I call.

He hands me the grounder sword we use for just this purpose. The tip has been heated up in the fire outside.

"Jasper! Monty! I need you to hold her down."

"No," Bellamy says.

The word is short and full of emotion, and it makes my heart ache.

I meet his eyes. "Bellamy, I have to do this. I have to protect the wound. You're going to have to trust me."

Slowly, he nods, and squeezes his sister's hand. I press the hot metal to the wound and Octavia screams, resisting Jasper and Monty's hands, before blacking out.

I sit in front of the fire with a cup of hot water. It's the closest thing we have to tea, and it keeps our hands warm. I watch the fire spreading its soft, dangerous fingers into the night. Octavia is sleeping in the drop ship. I hear excited voices coming from there, and I smile. Octavia must have woken up.

About five minutes later, I hear the sound of someone swinging aside the drop ship tarp and walking down. I turn around and see Bellamy walking toward me. He sits next to me and I smile.

"How is she?" I ask.

The wide smile on Bellamy's face gives it away. "She's fine," he says. "When she woke up, the first thing she said was 'I hate that damn knife.'"

I grin. "That sounds like her."

"Yeah. I was just happy to hear her at all," he says, turning toward me.

He has a strange look on his face. I don't know how to take his words.

"Bellamy, I had to seal the wound before I could stitch—"

He quickly interrupts me. "No, I didn't mean it like that. I just can't believe she's alive."

He looks at me and I smile. I hand him my cup of hot water.

"What's this?" he asks.

"To keep your hands warm," I reply. "I have to go check her bandages."

He nods and I stand up and begin the slow, tedious walk to the drop ship. His words stop me.

"Clarke, thank you. You really did save her," he says, eyes full of gratitude.

I smile, and he smiles back. _Really _smiles. Not just a smirk, or a tiny lift of the corners of the mouth. He truly smiles.

I don't realize until I get back inside the drop ship that I didn't feel any pain for the rest of the walk.

**AN: Hello! I hope you enjoyed that chapter. I hope everyone is enjoying the formatting of these chapters. I'm trying to move their relationship along slowly, so it seems normal instead of forced. I don't know if I am thinking too much about this or anything, but it would be great to see your thoughts on this chapter, or the whole storyline in general. Thank you for reading! :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

**AN: Hello, everyone! Thank you for all of the follows, favorites, and all that. I hope everyone likes this. Here is the third chapter! :)**

Bellamy:

_"You killed them all!" the Chancellor says. "They're dead because of you!" His voice rises, mingling with the foul scent of blood that sits in the air._

_ I shake my head. "No. No, I didn't know it would happen."_

_ "You threw away the radio, Bellamy." The way he says my name sends shivers down my spine. He steps closer, and blood pours from the wound in his stomach, running down to the ground with the rain. "You knew they would die."_

_ I shake my head, trying to hold on reality. I try to look anywhere but him. "I didn't know," I say, my voice cracking._

_ "Look around you! See all the people you killed! You did this. You brought this upon yourself. You chose this path, Bellamy."_

_ He keeps stepping closer, and I step back. He pushes me backward, and I trip over something. I look down and immediately gag. A body. I tripped over a body. Someone I killed. _

_ "You should join them, Bellamy. You deserve it."_

_ My throat is burning, and the stench is bringing tears to my eyes. "Just kill me! Just kill me."_

_ He steps forward and punches me in the face. He sends me flying to the ground, facedown in the mud._

_ "Just do it! It's what I deserve," I scream into the rain. _

_ He walks closer once again and bends down. I can see something in his eyes. Hatred._

_ Pure hatred._

_ I crawl backward, but slam into something. I slowly turn my head around, but quickly turn it back. I close my eyes, trying to erase the memory from my brain._

_ A pile. Of bodies. And I killed them all. _

_"Bellamy!"_

_I hear my name in the distance, but I can't see anyone. No one's there. Of course. No one cares, anyway. _

_The Chancellor looks into my eyes and whispers, his mouth curling upward in disgust. "No. You have to live. You owe it to them!"_

_"Bellamy!"_

_There. There's the voice again. But who is it? _

_"Bellamy!"_

"Bellamy!"

I sit up quickly, my whole body shaking. It was a dream. Just a dream. I look around, trying to decipher whom the voice was. Clarke is crouching next to me, her eyes full of concern. Why is she here?

She lays a hand on my shoulder. "Are you okay?"

I nod, slowly taking in the fact that she is here comforting me. Comforting _me. _How can she even look at me? Her touch is gentle, and I am a monster. I don't deserve it. But I want it anyway.

"What happened?" she asks softly.

I look up at her. Looking at her, here comforting me, I imagine how hard it should be for her to even speak to me. How can she be so kind? My tongue is caught in my throat, and I hear the Chancellor's voice once again.

_You have to live. You owe it to them!_

I can't look at her right now. I don't want to see her concern. I don't deserve it.

"I get nightmares too, you know," she whispers. "I see them in my dreams. I _hear _them."

My head shoots up quickly. She has nightmares too? Does she think of herself that way? She shouldn't. I have more than three hundred people who died because of me. How many does she have? I could probably count them on one hand if my brain was working properly.

"That's why I was awake that night Murphy attacked me. I kept seeing their faces. That's why I was awake earlier tonight."

"How did you hear me? Was I loud?" I ask her nervously. How many people heard me?

"I was just walking past your tent to the water. No one else, except the guards, is awake right now. They didn't hear you. It will be light soon, though, and people will be up."

I nod slowly.

She hesitates before asking, "What was it about? You kept saying 'just kill me' and 'I deserve it'."

She heard me? That's not helpful. "Nothing," I say quickly.

I look down at my blanket. How can I tell her what happened?

"Bellamy, look at me," she says simply.

The way she says it, with such sadness and kindness, makes me look up.

She smiles sadly. "You don't deserve it. Besides, someone has to help me lead the camp. You can't go dying on me."

The way she speaks makes my heart ache. I still am surprised that she cares so much that she is willing to do this.

I force myself to turn the corners of my lips upward. "Does this make me officially forbidden to die?"

She smirks and glances down. When her eyes return to mine, her smirk grows. "Officially. It's a direct order."

I can't stop myself from smiling at that. Something comes over me. I don't know what it is, but I suddenly pull her into my arms, hugging her tightly. She tenses for a second, and I wonder if I did something wrong. But then, she wraps her arms around my neck and buries her head in the crook of my neck. I don't know how long we stay like that before she speaks.

"I hope you know that it isn't really your fault those people died."

"Eighteen of our people dead."

"Eighty-two alive."

"Three hundred people from the ark that died because I threw away that radio."

"Those people were murdered by the council. You couldn't have possibly known that they would die."

If it's possible, I hug her tighter. Of course, someone chooses that exact moment to throw open my tent door.

"Hey, Bellamy—oh. Oh! Hey, Clarke! Am I interrupting something?" Miller sniggers quietly.

We have already attempted to untangle ourselves, but it is still pretty obvious what we were doing. Clarke's cheeks lightly flush, and I have to bite my tongue to hide my embarrassment.

Surprisingly, it's Clarke who speaks. "Miller, have you ever heard of privacy?"

"Oh! So it's privacy you two need. I'm sure that can be arranged. Could you two try to keep it down, though? Don't want anyone knowing!" Miller says.

Clarke buries her face in her hands, no doubt to hide her blush.

"Get out of here, Miller!" I say noisily.

"All right, all right. I'm going. Don't worry, Bellamy, I won't announce it or anything. I'm sure you want everything kept a secret."

A secret? Really, Miller? Before I can throw him out of my tent, he lifts his hands up in defense.

"I'm going!"

I raise my eyebrows at him, and he grins wildly at me. He slips quickly out of my tent, and I let out the breath I didn't realize I had been holding. Did Miller really think that Clarke and I were in some sort of relationship? Suddenly, my brain makes the connection. _Clarke. _She's still here.

"Right," she says, her awkwardness showing. "I'll see you later."

She starts to leave and I quickly grab her arm. "Clarke, thank you. For . . . you know."

She nods. "Of course."

And then she's gone. Something feels lost. That's the thing about Clarke, though. You don't realize how much you need her until she's gone.

And everyone needs Clarke.

.oO

It's been a week since Clarke and I have been caught hugging. I don't know why it has been affecting me this much. It's not that I'm embarrassed to be seen with Clarke herself, its just that I hate letting people in. I guess I just didn't realize that I had already let Clarke in. Still, I keep thinking about what she said.

_I get them too, you know._

To stop myself from thinking too hard about it, I decide to go visit Octavia. She's started to work in medical with Clarke now, and the two of them are doing shifts. For some reason, I keep avoiding Clarke ever since that day. It's not that I don't want to see her, because I do, but something is stopping me. I know Clarke sees it. She's tried to talk to me, and ask about my nightmares, but I always stop her. I feel too embarrassed. She shouldn't have to comfort me.

I always try to visit Octavia when Clarke isn't there. Sometimes, it has worked. Other times it hasn't. On those times, our greeting is short and forced. I can tell that Clarke is confused as to why I am ignoring her. I can tell she's hurt. I just can't let anyone in. So many people are dead because of me. I'm afraid to even be near Clarke and Octavia. But, Clarke can take care of herself, and Octavia is my little sister. I have to take care of Octavia.

My thoughts are churning so hard that I don't notice the person in front of me until I run into her.

She is coming out from the drop-ship, eyes tired. Her limp is almost gone, a fact that doesn't slip my mind. "Hey," she says quietly.

"Hey," I say back. I try to push around her to get to the drop ship, but her fingers wrap around my arm, stopping my movements.

"Wait," she says, "I want an answer."

I sigh. "An answer to what?" My words are forced, and I can tell they hurt her.

Nevertheless, she continues talking. She lets go of my arm now that she is convinced I will stay. "What happened? Why do you keep ignoring me?" I can feel her anger, and her rage is practically felt.

"I'm not ignoring you, _princess, _I just don't have time for you." I regret the words as soon as they leave my mouth, but I don't apologize.

"Well," she says, pursing her lips and folding her arms across her chest, "I hope you can put aside your selfish desires for once to help me plan for the grounders."

"Can it wait? I'm going to—"

She interrupts me quickly, "See Octavia. Yeah, I know. You still haven't answered my question."

"I did. You just won't accept my answer."

"You're right." Her words are short and full of anger. "I won't accept your answer. Because I know you're lying."

"How can you possibly know that? You _don't know _who I _am." _ She doesn't know who I am. She doesn't understand how horrible I am. She doesn't understand. No one does.

I look around us. A crowd is starting to gather. Wonderful. Everyone's here to see what happens when the two leaders fight. I wonder who they think will win.

"Bellamy, I know because I see it in your eyes. You say you only let your sister in, but you don't realize that you already let _us_ in." Her eyes run wild with rage. "You chose to let _every single one_ of us in when you decided to lead this camp." She is breathing heavily, and pauses before continuing. "Why won't you let me in?"

Something breaks inside of me, and I end up shouting at her. "Because I'm a monster! One day, everyone close to me is going to get hurt, and it'll be my fault. I _can't_ let anyone in!"

Her eyes soften. "Bellamy, you aren't a monster."

"How do you know that?" My voice is desperate, and all the pain I feel must be visible in my eyes.

"I know who you are, Bellamy. You're not a murderer."

And just like that my rage disappears. I look down at her, and I realize that she's right. She does know me. She leads this camp too. She knows about pain, and suffering, and loss. She _knows. _And somehow, I know her too. I know she's struggling. I know she's in pain. I know she feels guilty.

"Princess," I say, my voice soft.

It's all I say, but it's enough. She knows what it means. What it could mean. And it means a thousand different things. _I'm sorry. You're right. How can you be so kind? Thank you. How can you care so much? I know who you are, too. _

_I'm with you. _

My mind is spinning, emotions running wild. And, suddenly, I take her into my arms and hug her tightly. _I'm with you. _Her arms immediately tighten around me. I close my eyes. I can hear the quiet murmuring of voices around us. And I don't care.

"I'm sorry, princess," I whisper, holding her tighter. "I'm with you."

"I know," she replies gently, her breath tickling my neck. "I'm with you, too."

It's a promise. We both know it. And I know I'm never going to break it. We understand each other. We know each other. We are the same. _I'm with you._

**AN: Hello! This was my favorite chapter to write so far. I really tried to stay true to Bellamy's character, and I hope I accomplished that. For me, Bellamy and Clarke are both pretty hard characters to write, because I really try to capture their emotions. Thank you to all my new followers! I am so glad people, even if it isn't that many, like this. Let me know your thoughts on this chapter. I'm not entirely sure about the development of their relationship so far. I'm trying to write it slowly, but still capture the headstrong, stubborn emotions of both characters. Thanks for reading! :)**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

**AN: Thank you for all the follows and favorites! I'm so glad people are enjoying this. Here is the next chapter. I hope you like it! ;)**

Clarke:

The next morning is quiet. The woods are silent, and because I am the only one up, it's eerie. The trees have become little more than shadows. I shiver in the cold. I wrap my arms around myself and sigh. My breath makes small clouds in the cold air. The sun is just beginning to show itself, and I face the rising light. I just sit there, breathing in the fresh air and watching as the sun starts its journey.

I'm always the first one up. I don't know how it happens, but it does. My mind is always restless, and I have never needed much sleep. I suppose that explains why I am able to spend all of those long nights in the drop ship tending to the injured. I turn my face to the sun and watch as the first colors spread across the sky. First come the soft yellows and pale reds. It fades to blue as time goes on.

Behind me, I can hear the quiet rustling of people slowly waking up. Bellamy's leading a hunting expedition, and he told them to be ready by dawn. I smirk. It's funny how I'm up anyway. Suddenly, I feel the gentle pressure of a hand on my shoulder. I don't need to turn around to know who it is.

"What are you doing up, Clarke? It's early," he says.

I turn to face him and raise my eyebrows. "I'm always up this early."

Bellamy grins. "You sure you weren't trying to sneak off to come hunting?"

I roll my eyes. "I think everyone would benefit if I stayed here."

"And why is that, princess?"

"Someone has to tend to the certain imbeciles who manage to accidentally spear themselves while hunting." I smirk at him and he laughs.

"All right, fair enough." He reaches out a hand to help me up and I take it. He raises his eyebrows the second he touches my hand. "Your hands are freezing. How long have you been out here for?"

I shrug my shoulders. "I don't know. Forty-five minutes, maybe."

"How on earth did the princess manage that?" he says sarcastically, and I roll my eyes.

"Don't you have to go hunting?"

He picks up his spear and tells me, "Alright, Clarke, I'm gone." He snickers and turns away.

I roll my eyes at him and watch as he walks over to Miller's tent. Even from this distance, I can hear his loud voice yelling at Miller to get up. I chuckle. He always has to be the loud one.

I watch from afar as he goes quietly to Octavia's tent, and sticks his head in. Octavia comes out a few seconds later and wraps her arms around his neck. He smiles at her, and I find myself smiling as well. Someone breaks me out of my trance by tapping my shoulder.

I turn around and hold in a groan. Finn. I purse my lips and cross my arms across my chest.

"Yes, Finn?" I ask.

He glances down at the harsh tone of my voice, almost cringing. I glare at him. I thought I loved him. I really did. I may have never actually said it, but I did. But not anymore. He completely led me on. Perhaps he hadn't known that he would ever see Raven anymore, but he should have told me at least something.

He looks back up. He holds my gaze softly. "Clarke, I'm sorry," he begins, but I interrupt him.

"I really don't want to hear this, Finn."

"Clarke, please," he begs me, "I didn't know I would ever see her again."

"You had a girlfriend, Finn. You _have _one. And she loves you. So why are you going after me?" I am getting really frustrated with him.

"Because I love _you," _he says desperately.

I can see people gathering around us and I sigh inwardly. Really? Have they come to see another show?

I smirk slightly and look down. I take a step forward and look up. "I don't love you, Finn. If you can't see that, then—"

He cuts me off, grabbing my shoulders and kissing me hard. I am too shocked to move. Suddenly, my brain kicks in, and I push him off, rubbing my lips. He too is shocked, but I don't care. All I feel right now is rage. He kissed me in front of everyone.

"What the hell, Finn?"

He looks at me so lovingly and desperately that it makes me sick. "Clarke, I love you."

I slap him, hard. A flush covers his cheek where my hand was, and he looks up at me shocked, touching a hand to his cheek.

"Don't touch me, Finn. Raven loves you. Go to her."

He continues to beg me. "Clarke, please—"

"Don't touch me!" I'm yelling now.

I hear footsteps behind me and cringe. It's probably Raven come to slap me. Fun.

Instead, I hear the deep voice of Bellamy. He steps in front of me, almost protecting me.

"She said to stop, Spacewalker." His voice is harsh and angry, his posture ready to fight.

I put a hand on Bellamy's forearm. "Bellamy, I'm fine, really."

He meets my eyes, and his eyes soften. He looks at me for a few seconds before nodding. Bellamy steps backward beside me.

Finn looks between us, gears turning in his head. "Oh, this is good. The leaders? Who saw that coming, right? Well, I hope you two are happy together. You _deserve _each other, after everything the two of you have done."

I am breathing heavily, but I contain my temper. I see Bellamy clenching his fists out of the corner of my eye. I say quietly, "Go to Raven, Finn. She needs you."

"Clarke!" Someone calls from the drop-ship, and I turn to look. It's Octavia, waving me over.

I turn back around. "I'm needed in medical."

Finn looks like he is about to stop me, but I ignore him and turn around. I'm done with him.

I'm halfway there when Bellamy stops me.

"Hey," he says, his eyes concerned. "Are you okay?"

I nod slightly. "Yeah, I'm fine. He just doesn't know when to stop. Thank you, though, for stepping in. I was about to punch him."

He smiles. "Of course, princess. I still think one of us should have."

I smile back. "I'll see you later, Bell."

We go our separate ways. As I am walking back to the drop-ship, I realize I called him Bell. _Bell. _What his sister called him. I can feel my cheeks flushing and I groan inwardly. Now they _will _think we have some sort of relationship.

.oO

Night has fallen. I'm showing Octavia how to stitch up a cut, when I hear shouts coming from outside.

"Grounders!" Someone shouts. It's Bellamy. They must have gotten back.

I look at Octavia, and she looks back. I quickly tie off the thread on the boy's arm, and we walk outside together. Bellamy is picking up a gun, and trying to guide people away from the gate, where Anya is marching in with at least two-dozen soldiers. The gunners pick up their guns and cock them at Bellamy's command.

I jog down the ramp and run to stand at Bellamy's side. I can feel the tension between our people and the grounders radiating between us.

Anya holds a sword to her side. Her eyes are calculating, her posture tense. Her voice rings out strong and clear as she says, "I want to speak to your leader."

Bellamy and I share a glance, and he speaks up. "We don't want to speak to you."

Anya mutters something to one of her soldiers, and they grab someone from the crowd. The crowd shouts and tries to push the soldiers away, but they are too quick. One of the soldiers grabs Asher from the crowd. My breath catches in my throat. I promised him that I would protect him. He looks at me fearfully, and my heart aches. I can't break my promise.

"I will say this one more time," Anya states dominantly. She holds her head high. "I want to speak to your leader."

Bellamy steps forward immediately, but Anya shakes her head.

"No, not you. The other one."

Bellamy looks back at me, concerned. I nod slightly at him, and he steps back as I step forward.

"Here I am," I say.

I hold my head high. _Bravery. _They respect bravery. All of Anya's soldiers have their spears and swords pointed at me, but I don't look at them. I stare right at Anya. Anya looks me up and down, but stops when she realizes that I am doing the same thing.

Anya mutters something and the soldier holding Asher lets him go. Asher runs over to me and wraps his arms around me, hugging me. I hug him back.

"It's okay, Asher, it's okay."

He slowly lets go of me, and I step in front of him, shielding him.

"What do you want, Anya?"

"You say you want peace, sky girl. Are you willing to do what it takes to have an alliance?" Anya's tone is almost sarcastic, and she has a small smile painted across her face.

"I am," I say simply.

"Good," Anya says. She shouts something out that I don't understand, and her soldiers move through the crowd.

I turn and watch as they take the youngest members of our group from the crowd. My eyes widen as they are taken to stand by Asher. I hear them calling out for Bellamy and I. Bellamy and I look desperately at each other. I quickly turn around.

"What are you doing?" I ask Anya.

"We need seconds for our warriors. We start training them at around the age of twelve or thirteen."

"No," I say. The word is simple and strong.

"What? I thought you wanted this alliance, sky girl."

"I do. We all do. But you can't take our people for your own."

Anya says something and the archers raise their bows, loading an arrow into them. A little more than a dozen arrows are pointed at me. I push the kids behind me and step forward.

"These arrows are laced with poison. I suggest you move."

"I won't let you take them."

Anya raises her eyebrows. "My warriors will shoot."

"I'm not moving, Anya. Fire away."

There is a tense silence that is louder than anything I have heard. Finally, Anya says something, and the warriors lower their weapons.

"You are brave, girl."

"I'm just protecting my people. Same as you," I tell her. They respect bravery. And now, they have recognized mine.

"Would you be willing to protect our people as well?" Anya asked me. I knew this was a test. The other was probably a test as well.

"Yes. Would you be willing to protect us?" I ask her in reply.

She pauses for a few long seconds before nodding. "Yes. Your alliance will be helpful to us. I think we can help you, as well."

I look back at Bellamy, and he meets my eyes. He steps forward to stand by me.

"Do we have an agreement?" I ask Anya, holding out my hand for her to shake.

She nods. "Yes." She walks forward to meet me and takes my hand. We shake hands, and the deal is set.

"We can work out the particulars later," I tell her, and she nods.

"Agreed. Let's set a meeting date," Anya says.

I think for a bit. We need something that is common ground. "What about the river? We could meet there in a week."

Anya nods and adds, "Be there by noon."

I nod in reply, and wait for a response. I don't get one. Anya simply turns to her warriors, says something, and walks out. After they finally leave, I let out a breath I didn't realize I had been holding.

I did it. I actually did it. We have an alliance with the _grounders. _I suddenly remember the kids, and turn around. "Is everyone alright?"

There are murmured replies to confirm their well being, and I smile. "Good."

Exhaustion begins to kick in, and my smile falls. I begin to walk toward my tent, when Asher steps in front of me.

"Hey, Asher," I say to the boy.

He smiles back. "Hey. I just wanted to thank you again. You protected me. You kept your promise."

I nod. "Yeah, I guess I did." I pause before saying, "I told you that we would do anything to put all of you first."

"But you were willing to die for me. For all of us," Asher says.

I lick my lips. "Of course I was. And I still am. Bellamy and I can't let any more of you die."

He seems to sense my guilt. "Their deaths aren't your fault. Neither of you killed them," Asher says gently.

"They were in our charge. I may as well have."

I smile gently at him and continue to walk toward my tent. I sit on my makeshift bed and reach for the canteen of water I keep at my bedside. As I lift the bottle to my lifts, there is a rustling of my tent. I look up, and see Bellamy walk in. I swallow the water.

"Hey," I say in greeting.

"Hey," he says in reply. "Do you mind if I sit?" Once I shake my head, he sits down next to me.

We sit in a comfortable silence. After about a minute, Bellamy finally speaks. "You really were brave today."

I look at him and he meets my gaze. "I wasn't being brave," I tell him, "I was just protecting my people."

"The way you did it was brave. You looked straight at Anya and told them to fire away." He smiles. "_That _was brave."

I smile back at him, and we just sit there. I watch as his eyes drift down to my lips. And suddenly, his hands are on my cheeks, and he's pressing his lips to mine. Soft. _Warm. _I am too shocked to do anything. My hand stay locked at my sides as if held there my some great force. Bellamy pulls away, and his hands fall down.

He licks his lips. "Sorry, princess, I didn't mean to do that."

It's only when he stands up that I regain control over my body. He is reaching toward my tent exit when I finally stand up and speak.

"Bellamy."

It's all I say, but it's enough. It's always been enough. He stops and turns around. I cross quickly toward the other side of my tent and press my lips to his. He responds immediately. One hand runs through my hair, and the other is on my back, pulling me closer to him. I reach my hands up to his hair, and thread my fingers between the curls there. Everything I've been holding in and denying, I let out. We can deny it as much as we want, but our feelings are on display. Almost was never enough.

He is everywhere. I taste him. I feel him. I sense him.

I know him.

It is full of adrenaline. He pulls me closer, and I hang on to him. I don't let go. I can't. I'm too afraid that if I do, I'll collapse. Our kiss slows, and we finally pull away, breathing heavily. I lean my forehead on his and lick my lips.

"Goodnight, princess," he whispers gently.

The way he says my nickname makes my heart ache. "Goodnight."

And then there's a rustling of my tent as I am left alone.

_Bellamy._

**AN: Yay! I finally wrote the kiss scene! Sorry for the exclamation points. I have been planning this chapter for a while and I was so excited to finally write it. What do you think about the kiss scene? This is the way I imagine they should kiss in the show. One song I've been thinking about that goes really well with their relationship is "Almost is Never Enough" by Ariana Grande. If you noticed, I used about two lines of the songs in one of the last paragraphs. Obviously, I don't own that song.**

**I apologize for getting this up a bit later than my usual schedule. I had a bunch of doctor appointments and a schedule change, so that wasn't helpful to my writing time. Anyway, tell me what you think about the alliance, and the kiss scene. I apologize for anyone who likes Finn. Personally, I don't, and I was just trying to get my opinion on his character in there. Perhaps he was a bit out of character, but that is why I am writing this story to begin with! Although, I hope Bellamy and Clarke aren't too OOC. Finally, some Bellarke! :)**


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Eight

Bellamy:

I kissed her. And she kissed me back. I had been so worried when she didn't kiss me back the first time. I smirk when I remember her calling me Bell the other day. It didn't slip my mind that she had blushed afterwards. I didn't mind that she called me that, though.

I had actually wanted her to call me that for a while now. But how do you ask her something like that? She's Clarke. She probably would have laughed in my face.

Or maybe not.

The only thing I'm thinking about as I pull on my boots is Clarke. The way she clung to me desperately. The way she said my name. Bellamy.

It gave me chills. I almost regret leaving her like that, and just slipping out of her tent. I didn't know what else to do. My mind drifts. I wonder if she's regretting kissing me in the first place. She probably is. Knowing her, she'll probably ignore me today.

I won't be able to take it if she does. I need her. She has to help me lead these people. And, anyway, I need her. She sees me differently than most people. She trusts me. And I trust her.

I pull myself up on the bed. It's time to face Clarke. I shake my head. She's going to ignore me today. I know it. Who would want me?

I make my way outside and my eyes immediately scan the camp for Clarke. I quickly realize it's what I've always done. I've always looked for her.

I find her, sitting on the drop ship ramp next to Asher. She's like a big sister to him. They've become so close. I don't realize I'm staring at them until Miller comes up behind me.

"Yeah, she's pretty hot, huh? Think she'll go for a guy like me?"

I purse my lips. She's hot? He can't think that! I am suddenly overcome with a possessive feeling in my chest.

"What did you say?" My voice is surprisingly calm, but my heart is beating fast, and my fists are clenched at my sides.

He laughs and hits my shoulder. "I'm kidding, man. I just wanted to see how you would react. She's all yours."

"Good," I say firmly, before I realize what Miller said. She's all mine. Damn it. Clarke will hear about this by the end of the day, knowing Miller.

I walk over to the side of the drop ship to get my rations. Or to look at Clarke. No, I decide. Both.

I braced myself for some sarcastic comment or nothing at all. But I am surprised when she turns her head to me.

"Hey, Bell," she says, smiling at me.

I can't help but be shocked. But her smile is so beautiful I end up smiling back at her.

"Hey, Princess. Asher." I nod in the kid's direction.

He smiles at me in return.

Clarke turns to Asher and says, "I'll be right back." He nods, and then she turns to me. "Can we talk?"

My stomach drops. Here it comes. Rejection. My smile is wiped off my face, and I say stiffly, "Sure."

She bites her lip and stands up, walking inside. I follow after her, my mind whirring. I'm sure she hates me now. The drop ship is empty of patients on this level, so the quiet is comforting. It's also sinister, in a way.

Her voice echoes off the walls when she speaks. "I know you're probably regretting kissing me yesterday," she starts, and I stand there, shocked. Regret? No! "So I understand if you're angry at me. I just-"

"Princess," I say, interrupting her. I step closer to her. "I don't regret it." One more step. "I'm not angry at you." Another step. She backs up, and her back hits the drop ship wall.

Her voice is steady. "You aren't?"

"No."

I step closer, pinning her against the wall. She stares at me for a long time, before smirking, just slightly. I press my mouth against hers desperately, and she kisses me back with the same desperation. She wraps an arm around my neck and holds me closer. I hold on to her waist.

I slowly pull away from Clarke. I smile at her. She's so beautiful.

"You're mine, Clarke," I say. "And everyone knows it.

"Of course I am," she says.

And her mouth meets mine again.

"I knew it!" Someone shouts as they clamber down the ladder.

I pull away from Clarke, sighing. Her lips are swollen and her hair is a mess, but she is mine.

I turn around and glare at Octavia. "What did you know?"

She grins and jumps off the ladder. "That she's yours, of course!"

Clarke blushes, and my cheeks heat up.

"What did you hear, Octavia?" Clarke asks.

She grins even wider. "Everything."

Clarke groans, and I pull her into a hug.

"You weren't meant to," I say to Octavia.

"I know! But it's all okay, because I ship Bellarke!"

"Bellarke?" Clarke asks, turning her head towards Octavia.

"Yeah! Bellamy and Clarke. Gosh, you guys are so gullible. I was just waiting for the two of you to hook up. But don't worry, I won't say anything!"

I am suddenly reminded that is what Miller said when he found Clarke in my tent. Octavia leaves the drop ship, and Clarke and I turn to each other.

We burst out laughing at the same time. As our laughter finally dies down, I look at Clarke.

I kiss her forehead, and, with my arm around her shoulders, lead her outside.

My princess.

AN: This has got to be my favorite chapter so far! I love Octavia as a Bellarke fan in these stories, and just had to put her in there. I will update tomorrow!

Feedback?


	6. Chapter 6

Clarke:

It's been four days since Anya came into our camp. Everyone in this camp wants peace. I just hope we can give it to them.

Bellamy is going hunting again today. I'm going to try to come with him, but he's probably going to try to stop me. But that's okay. It shows that he cares.

The people who are going with him are gathering around him now. I duck into my tent and quickly grab my bag, before sticking a knife in my right boot.

I go outside and join the people there. But Bellamy noticed me immediately.

"Come to wish me off, princess?" He asks.

I roll my eyes. "No, Bellamy. I'm coming with you."

His face immediately tenses. "No you aren't."

I sigh. "I need medicine. Besides, I can't just stay cooped up in here all day."

He looks at me for a long while before giving in. "Alright. Just stay close."

I smile at him, and walk with the others through the gate. It's silent in these woods. But the silence is loud. You can hear every footfall and every slight stumble any of us makes. It's almost beautiful. I didn't realize I had been making my way up front until I saw Bellamy at my side.

Suddenly, he motions for everyone to stop. I follow his gaze to a large cat. We've eaten them before. The meat is tough, but it is food nonetheless. Our group ducks down in the large leaves to watch the cat. It's eating what looks like a rabbit. From this angle, though, it's hard to tell.

And then there's a sharp twang of the arrow as the cat slumps dead. I turn around, and the boy behind me has stood up. He's a good shot. The arrow went right into the heart.

As they all go over to the kill, I look at the plants around me. I recognize these. But what are they? I should remember this. I was the top of the class in Earth Botany. And then my brain clicks.

I've forgotten the name of the plate, but it doesn't matter, because I know what it does. It, if ground into a paste, is numbing. It numbs the nerves around the area for a short period of time, but it is long enough. I grin, and begin to pull up the plant.

"What did you find, princess?" Bellamy asks behind me.

I smile at him and stand up, stuffing the last handful of the plant into the bag.

"Medicine. This will numb your nerves for about five minutes." My smile drops though, at the thought. I suddenly remember all of the people who were in pain as I was operating all of them. "I should have gotten this sooner," I finish, pursing my lips and standing up.

Bellamy puts his hands on my shoulders. "Hey, Clarke." He pauses there to look intensely at me. I don't know how much longer I can take with out touching him. And his hands on my shoulders are making that worse. "You've done good."

I look down and nod. It continues like this for most of the day. Someone spotting something. We all hide. I look for medicine along the way. Quickly, though, our haul has become as much as we can carry.

I end up carrying two rabbits, along with my pack.

We walk up to the wall and Bellamy yells, "Open the gate! We're back!"

The gate creaks open, and we walk through. Bellamy puts the meat he's carrying on a tarp, and everyone else begins to do the same. I'm tossing my rabbits into the pile, when I hear my name being called desperately from the other side of camp.

I turn my head and see Octavia. It looks like she's been crying. What happened? But her words make my stomach drop. "It's Asher."

I don't think. I don't look toward Bellamy. I just start running. Someone runs behind me. Bellamy, probably. The blood pounds in my ears as my feat hit the drop ship ramp.

Octavia looks at me desperately. "I couldn't do anything. I got him out of there in time."

"In time?" Bellamy asks, behind me.

"The grounders don't want peace," Octavia said.

I swing open the tarp and look around the room for Asher. He's lying on a table on the far right. I move so quickly I'm there within seconds. His eyes are closed, but he's breathing. Barely.

My eyes scan his body for injuries, and then I see it. It starts from the center of his stomach and travels along to below his bottom right rib. A cut. I immediately pull the leaves out of my bag, and begin to crush them, working fast.

My heart is pounding loud, but I'm able to calm myself. "Where were you? How did this happen?"

"He wanted to see the river," Octavia says. "They just kept shooting."

It's all she says, but it's enough. I start to clean Asher's wound, and he begins to wake up.

"Hey, Ash," I say. "I'm going to help you, okay. Just stay with me."

"Clarke," he groans, reaching out his hand to me.

"Yes?" I'm at his side in an instant.

I grab his shaking hand. It's covered in blood from holding his wound. Tears begin to form in our eyes. And then, the dirty, ugly truth displays himself when he speaks.

"I'm not going to make it. Just stop trying."

I'm crying when I speak next. "I can't let you die. You're too young."

He gulps in large breaths of air. It's getting harder for him to stay. "Clarke," he says, his voice cracking.

"You don't deserve this."

He breathes in desperately, and then lets it out.

"That's it," I say, as I stroke his hair. "Just keep breathing."

But his hand falls limp in mine.

AN: Hello! Sorry about the small amount of Bellarke in this, but I think it's important to the story that this chapter happens. I just started reading the books, and I realized that there is a character called Asher in there already! I wasn't trying to copy the books, because I hadn't read them when I first wrote Asher's character.

Feedback?


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter Seven**

**Bellamy:**

I've only seen Clarke like this once before. But that was when she was trying to fix her leg. She had felt alone. I hope she knows by now that she isn't. I want to move-to go stand by her. But I feel like I would be interrupting. They are like siblings. They should be alone for this. She's stroking Asher's hair, and telling him that he just need to keep breathing. There's a certain desperation in her eyes. The way she looks at his wound, trying to discern the fatality of it.

But I know better. And because I know Clarke, I know that she realizes it too. I swallow, hard. I want to tell her there's hope. I want to help her. But her independence is almost indestructible, and my feet are planted to the ground.

My eyes flicker to Asher's premature face. Clarke's right. He doesn't deserve this. He's too young to die. Asher was too young in the first place, when they arrested him. But he was still deemed unimportant. Did they think of him as just a prisoner number? Prisoner 241. I heard him tell Clarke his number a few days ago. He was shaking when he spoke.

But Clarke had smiled, and put her arm around his shoulder, holding him close. "I was prisoner 319," she had said. And he had looked up at her with hope. I knew then, that he was content, for the first time on earth. That's who Clarke is. She is hope.

I watch them closely. Asher's face is drawn tightly with pain, and he is crying silently. He squeezes her hand and the tears run freely. I don't have to look at Clarke to know that she is crying. She must be so shaken to know that she can't save him.

"Just keep breathing," she says gently, but her voice is shaky. She is afraid. She can't help him, but more than anything she wants to.

She runs her fingers through his hair, and looks intently at his face. My heart aches for them. Breathe, Asher. Just stay with us. Clarke needs you. But he doesn't move. He doesn't blink. He doesn't breathe. And I know he's gone.

Clarke's heart wrenching sob echoes off the ship's walls before I hear it myself. She's calling for him, desperately.

"Ash," she whispers, and her hands drop to her sides. Her shoulders shake.

But she bursts into action. She's trying to save him. Anyone in grief would. But her grief is fresh. That's the worst of it. She says his name, over and over again as she pushes hard on his chest.

"Come on, Ash!" Clarke is desperate. "Come on!"

She pinches his nose and blows air into his lungs before pressing on his chest again. I suddenly find myself able to move. I walk over to her quietly. I don't want to do this. I don't want to take her away from him like this.

She repeats the CPR over and over again.

"Clarke," I say quietly. I am surprised I've found my voice, in the midst of it all. Clarke's pain is evident, and it hurts me to see her like this.

But she doesn't hear me. "Come on, Ash! Please!"

For a second I think he's moved. But then I realize that it's Clarke who has. She's leaning over the table, sobbing. Her hands clench the edge of the table and her knuckles turn white.

I swallow. "Clarke."

She slowly turns to Ash again. "I'm sorry," she says between sobs.

And she cries once more. As I near Clarke, I can hear footsteps as they disappear in the distance. Octavia must have left.

Slowly, I put my hands on her shoulders. I spin her around and pull her into my chest. The simple motion makes her shake. I know the feeling. It's the feeling you get when you realize how much someone cares. I get it when I'm around Clarke. I felt it when she told me who I was. People feel it the most when they are in pain. When someone comforts you, you always cry more. And you wonder-how could they care for you? I know that is what Clarke is thinking.

She holds tightly into my shirt. I can feel her heartbeat because of the small amount of space between us. It's beating fast, as one would expect. Clarke's feeling everything right now-shock, grief, guilt. And its killing her.

"Shh," I say, holding her head to my chest. "I'm here. It's okay."

But I know it isn't. This isn't the Clarke I know. The Clarke I know is strong, no matter what. She pulls through pain. If anything, it makes her stronger. I wish I could just take her pain away. Her tears soak through my shirt, and onto my chest. But somehow, in some twisted way, I feel almost closer to her. I can feel her pain. I remember our promise from a few days ago. I'm with you. But it isn't enough to think it. I have to let her know that.

And so, as her sobs gradually grow quieter, I lead her away from the table. "Look at me, princess," I tell her.

She draws in a shaky breath and slowly brings her eyes up to meet mine. My heart aches for her. Clarke's eyes are red, and her cheeks are painted with tear tracks. But she is beautiful, because she is mine. My princess.

"I'm with you," I tell her, "remember?"

Her voice is shaky and tired, but it's a start. "Yeah."

"Good," I say.

I kiss her forehead and pull her close to me once more. But as I do, I see the body of Asher on the table in front of me. His hand has fallen off of the table. My eyes widen in sadness and realization. He had reached out to Clarke. He knew Clarke needed him. He had tried to stay, for her. She gave him hope, and he had tried to give it to her in return. Hope.

That's what he wanted Clarke to have. That's what I want Clarke to have. And I know, it this moment, in this pain, I will do anything it takes to give Clarke what she needs.

Anything.

**AN: Hello! I hope you enjoyed that chapter. I am trying to improve my writing, and I hope I am accomplishing that. Thank you for everyone who supported this story recently! **

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	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter Eight**

**Clarke:**

Bellamy stayed with me last night. He didn't say much, but he held me. And it was enough. He didn't mention Asher anymore, but I know that we will have to talk about it soon. A grounder shot him. If that's true, then we shouldn't go to the meeting that is set up today. It's been a week since Anya came into the camp. But I won't be fooled by her anymore.

I'm pulling my boots on when Miller poked his head in.

"Clarke, we need-" but he stops. I know he's looking at my eyes, which are probably bloodshot and swollen by now. I don't even bother to look away. "Are you okay?" He finishes.

Am I okay? No, I'm not okay. The boy who was like my little brother was just murdered by a grounder and I couldn't save him. He's buried with the other dead. And the people don't even know, because Bellamy and I didn't want to scare them. So we have said nothing.

But I am a leader. I have to look strong for my people, even if it means lying about the simplest things. "Yeah, I'm fine." But then I realize that I would have told him that no matter what. Why let on that something was wrong when you don't want anyone to know about it? "What did you need?"

He looks at me for a moment, his eyes calculating. His brows are furrowed but he slowly nods. "Okay." He looks unconvinced, but he continues. "May just did something to her ankle."

I nod as I continue to lace up my boots. I brush the hair out of my face, and slowly stand up. Was it this hard to do anything yesterday? Miller slips out from my tent and I follow him. One of the older boys is holding a girl in his arms near the drop ship. I'm assuming that she is May.

The boy kicks aside the tarp with his boot and goes inside. As I begin to walk faster, I remember Miller.

"Thanks for telling me, Miller," I say.

He nods, and turns his back on me to go get breakfast. I run to the drop ship, and I think I see Bellamy beside me. I swing aside the tarp and see that the boy, who I now recognize as Jasper, has brought the girl near to the table.

"Clarke!" He says anxiously, "thank god you're here!"

"Yeah," I say shortly. "What happened?"

"I was climbing a tree," says May. "It was kind of stupid, I know. I just fell."

I nod and then look at the table. That's when I see the stain. It's not much, but it's enough for me to notice. And it hurts to see his blood like that. But I swallow and grab a rag to wipe it down.

I scrub at Asher's blood. "Just get her up here, Jasper," I say quietly.

As I walk away from the table to wash the rag and put it away, Bellamy stops me.

"Princess," he says, concerned, "you don't have to do this."

I lick my lips and swallow. I wish I didn't have to do this. I wish I didn't have to do anything. But I have to. Octavia doesn't know as much as me about medical issues, and she hasn't come out of her tent yet. She blames herself, I know it. I don't blame her, but I do wish that she could have gotten him out quicker. It's wrong of me, but I do.

"I have to, Bel," I say at last. "No one else knows how."

"At least let me stay here with you."

I pause. Should I let him do that? What if the camp needs him? But right now, I choose to be selfish. I need him. And so I nod.

"Okay. You can stay here," I tell him.

And he does.

The amount of patients that come in that day seem to be larger than yesterday. Bellamy ended up sewing a cut today, because I didn't have enough hands. I'm exhausted, but everyone needs me. I can't stop.

Bellamy finally pulls me aside, after I finish putting a splint on someone's arm.

"Clarke, you've been here all day. You look exhausted. You can rest, you know." He says it as a statement, but I know that he means it as a command.

I sigh and rub the thin sheen of sweat off my brow with the back of my hand. "I know. But they need help."

"Clarke, they're fine. If anyone else comes in, I can just get Octavia."

"But-"

"It's an order," he says gently. "You need to rest."

I look at the blood that stains my shirt. How much is Asher's? The thought makes me press my lips tightly together. I only have one shirt, and I haven't had time to wash this one. I draw in a shaky breath and sigh.

"Okay," I say at last.

I meet his eyes and he smiles gently at me.

"That's my girl," he says.

His words make my heart dance. His girl. I am his. And he is mine. Slowly, I smile at him. He grins as the corner of my mouth turn up, and then captures my lips with his. My smile grows against his mouth and I immediately respond.

This is Bellamy. He makes me smile, even at times like this. He takes me away from the pain. He makes me forget Asher. He is mine. I give in to the need, and pull him closer.

Thank you.

His fingers thread through my hair and down my back.

I need you.

I kiss him, harder and harder until I have to stop for air. We come up gasping, but we are smiling. I lean my forehead on his.

"I love you."

I don't realize I've said it until I've finished. But he doesn't push me away. His eyes don't leave mine.

His eyes grow softer. "I wanted to say it first," he says gently.

I smile and lick my lips at his words.

"I love you, princess," he says.

I grin. "I know."

**AN: Okay doke, so that was the chapter. I hope you guys liked that. I just couldn't wait any longer without making any more Bellarke scenes. **

**Feedback is awesome!**


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter Nine**

**Bellamy:**

It's the middle of the night when I wake up. But I can't go back to sleep. My mind keeps churning, and it's keeping me awake. So I don't try to fall asleep.

I shrug on my jacket and boots and slip outside my tent. I just close my eyes and breathe. The night air is cold, but it is calming to me. The cold alerts my senses, and I immediately spot the gentle light that's coming from Clarke's tent.

That's right. She has nightmares too. Is that why she is up? I cross the camp silently, making my way to her tent. It's funny, because I remember how loud I was when we first arrived. Everyone was loud. But we've grown. Not just individually, but as a group. We are the same.

There's a slight scratching sound coming from Clarke's tent. I pause outside and wrinkle my brow. What is that?

"Princess?" I ask quietly, "are you awake?"

The scratching noise stops, and there's a slight rustle. Clarke pulls aside the tent and looks up at me.

She gives the tent flap to me wordlessly and slips inside. She wants me to follow. There's no communication necessary. I pull aside her tent exit, and slip inside after her.

"I'm making a map," she says, answering the question I was about to ask.

"Then what was the scratching noise? Aren't maps made with paper?"

She rolls her eyes at me. "Yes, Bellamy, maps are generally made with paper. But, do you see any paper around here?"

"Ah," I say, "good point."

"Mine always are," she says in response.

"Cocky."

"Arrogant."

"Same thing," I tell her humorously.

She looks up at me, her eyes wide with happiness. "Mmm." She smiles. "Exactly."

I smile back at her before remembering the map. "So, if you aren't using paper, then what are you using?"

She bends down and picks up a large piece of metal. How did I not notice that before? Probably because my attention was focused on Clarke.

"I'm using this," she says, handing it to me. "A piece from the drop ship."

I look at her work. It's amazing. It truly is. She has carved into the metal a representation of our camp, the bodies of water nearby, and the forest. She's added the grounder's camp as well. But she hasn't just simply put it into the metal. She's made it into a piece of art. She doesn't know how talented she is.

"Clarke," I say, "this is amazing."

She smiles as I hand the map back to her. "Thanks. I thought it could help take my mind off things. Besides, it would help the camp."

Silence falls between us, and the only noise is the slight rustle the wind make against the tent.

"So why are you up?" she asks after a while.

"Couldn't sleep," I say simply. "You?"

Her smile falters, just slightly. She purses her lips. "Sleep wasn't..." her voice drifts off. She quickly catches herself, and her eyes return to mine. "Favorable, if you know what I mean," she finishes.

I nod. I do know what she means. And that's why I pull her into a hug. Nightmares. The word is unspoken, but it sits between us. The silence is heavy, drifting between us and embracing us tightly. Clarke slowly pulls away, and begins to speak. She hesitates slightly before speaking.

Her eyes flicker with pain as she speaks. "Asher told me something, the day before he died." She cringes at the word, no doubt remembering everything, and looks away.

I smile sadly at her, and gently pull her chin up. Her eyes slowly drift towards mine. "Hey, you don't have to tell me."

"I know," she says, her voice flickering with sadness. "But I want to." She breathes a shaky breath, and I let my hand fall to my side. "Asher talked about his family a lot. But his story changed slightly every time. Especially when he would tell me about his father. One day he told me his father worked for a Phoenix man. But the next day, he told me his father was a guard on Phoenix. The stories never matched up.

"The day before he died, I confronted him. I knew he was keeping something from me. I just didn't know what. It was like he was trying to protect me from something. I finally got him to tell me." Her breath catches at the end of her sentence, and she licks her lips. Her eyes return to mine, slowly. Eventually, she says, "His father was mine too. He never actually knew who our father was. His mother just told him the name. Jake Griffin."

**AN: Hello! So this was a really short update, but I just wanted to get something done. Thank you to all of my readers, and the lovely reviews. They really keep me inspired. **

**What did you think of the plot twist? Feedback? **

**I will try to update soon! **


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